Cat Commandments
Thou shall not sit in front of the television or monitor as thou are transparent.
Thou shall not projectile vomit from the top of the refrigerator.
Thou shall not walk in on a dinner party and commence licking thy butt.
Thou shall not lie down with thy butt in thy human's face.
Thou shall not leap from great heights onto thy human's genital region.
Fast as thou are, thou cannot run through closed doors.
Thou shall not reset thy human's alarm clock by walking on it.
Thou shall realize that the house is not a prison from which to escape at any opportunity.
Thou shall not push open the bathroom door when there are guests in thy house.
Thou shall remember that thou are a carnivore and that houseplants are not meat.